Heavy metal cat at it again

If you’re a cat lover you’ll totally understand this. Here is Patapuss, my four-legged feline house-friend showing off that natural talent that all cats have for parking themselves in the one spot they’re definitely not meant to be.

Seriously, of all the locations available to you in the not-overly-small house that I live in, the music collection was the spot that was most singularly comfortable over all others?

I suppose I should be grateful it’s not worse. My computer is going in for repairs because Patapuss threw up on it the other day (when you’re a cat owner, you no longer get angry when this happens; with a sigh or a groan you simply resign yourself to what the world is throwing at you). It wasn’t the thick, chunky chuck mind you, but the watery one-off after-chuck. It must have leaked into the inner workings of my machine because the fan now only functions on full bore and the clock has gone haywire, causing mayhem with my Last.fm scrobble stats

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On another occasion, I came home to find our other cat, Tomato, sitting on one of my turntables. I wouldn’t have minded quite so much if he hadn’t of managed to turn the damn thing on. And talking of records, if you were to look closely at the spines of the cardboard LP sleeves you’d notice what looks like extensive damage. Turns out record sleeves are evidently the perfect claw-sharpening material.

So yes, it could be worse. In fact, it’s even a little endearing, what with Patapuss knowing good music when he comes across it (this makes him a  cat of discrimination and good taste).

Iron Maiden: The Reincarnation Of Benjamin Breeg

Iron Maiden is the best heavy metal band. Don’t try to argue the point, just accept it. I got into Iron Maiden when I was 10 or so years old after seeing the Be Quick Or Be Dead music video clip from the then-new Fear Of The Dark album. I’ve loved them ever since and am immensely happy to have seen them live on five occasions on two tours.

I’ve always said that Iron Maiden were at their best whenever it was that you discovered Iron Maiden. Ask any two Iron Maiden fans what their favourite album is, and you’ll rarely get the same answer. If two fans do happen to nominate as their favourite the same item from the Iron Maiden discography, it’s unlikely they’ll name the same favourite Iron Maiden song.

THE TWO BEST IRON MAIDEN ALBUMS

My personal favourite Iron Maiden album is Fear Of The Dark because that’s what got me into them at the time. Iron Maiden’s commercial (and critical) success was starting to wane at the time, as was singer Bruce Dickinson’s enthusiasm. Consequently, my second-favourite Iron Maiden album is The X-Factor, the first of the two much-maligned *shock gasp* Blaze Bayley-era-vocals Iron Maiden albums. In the three years that passed between Fear Of The Dark and The X-Factor I grew to love everything there was about Iron Maiden. When you’re a young teenager, three years seems like an eternity, so when The X-Factor finally came out after many delays I just couldn’t get enough of it. I distinctly recall dubbing the album to tape from my grandfather’s CD player (I got my own boombox a year later) and pretty much destroyed the cassette from repeated listens.

So those are in my personal view the two best Iron Maiden albums. As stated, everyone’s opinion will differ. And for that same reason, I also have my least favourite (“least best?”) album by Iron Maiden: A Matter Of Life And Death.

A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH

The band’s fourteenth album, A Matter Of Life And Death is also the third “second coming” album for Bruce Dickinson. He re-enlisted for vocal duties on 1999’s Brave New World album, as did guitarist Adrian Smith, providing Iron Maiden with no less than three guitarists and a bass.

A Matter Of Life And Death was critically acclaimed upon its release in 2006… and yet it’s the only Maiden album I can’t get into, try as I might.

I still don’t know what it is… Bruce’s not-quite-air-raid-anymore vocals? The fact that the album was intentionally not mastered? I really don’t know, but it’s worth noting that A Matter Of Life And Death is regarded in some circles as the band’s most self-indulgent album. This is evident by the fact that during the A Matter Of Life And Death tour they played the album in its entirety, with only a handful of anthems played towards the end of each show. While Iron Maiden deserve full credit for doing something genuinely different, both on record and live, an act such as this was, once could argue, noodly self-indulgence — and unsurprisingly, the track selection for the tour upset loads of fans.

My copy of this single from the best heavy metal band came from the best record shop in Australia. 

THE REINCARNATION OF BENJAMIN BREEG

To close, the artwork above is for The Reincarnation Of Benjamin Breeg, the lead single from A Matter Of Life And Death. As with the rest of the tracks from this album, there’s just something about it that I find very difficult to get into compared to every other Iron Maiden album. The intro feels a bit weak, Bruce’s voice doesn’t seem to hit the mark and, while it breaks my heart saying this, there’s not much to it that I find overly memorable, other than perhaps the main riff. On the other hand, if that’s Iron Maiden’s worst, then I can happily live with that. It all gets back to that whole expectations thing. The inclusion of Hallowed Be They Name (Radio 1 ‘Legends’ Session), a classic track from the The Number Of The Beast album, is a nice touch in that it’s still a live rendition of a track but not one played to an arena.

Iron Maiden have been around for 30 years. They’ve released 15 studio albums, have three live guitarists and a bass player, and have performed more than 2000 live shows. Every time a reference is made to their estimated 85 million record sales, we are inevitably reminded that this extraordinary fact has been achieved with relatively minimal commercial airplay and exposure. When you’re that damn good, rock n’ roll lore allows you to have that one excessively self-indulgent album — the operative word here is “one” here. Just don’t disappear up your own arses by doing it on every one of your last five albums, like our friends Manowar have been known to do

Ultimately I tip my hat to Iron Maiden for not sticking to the formula. Which is exactly why Iron Maiden is the best heavy metal band around, no matter when or how old you were when you really got into them.

Endzeit Bunkertracks VI

I’ve been a fan of the Endzeit Bunkertracks compilations ever since I got my hands on the first edition of this excellent EBM, industrial, electro, aggrotech (or whatever the kids call it these days) compilation back in 2005.

The complete Endzeit Bunkertracks compilations, from Act I to VI.

The Endzeit Bunkertracks are by Alfa Matrix — a Belgian record label that specialises in EBM, industrial music and a whole loads of other darker-leaning electronic sounds. And what I like about every Endzeit Bunkertracks compilation CD is the fact that it’s a straightforward yet somewhat daring concept given that we live in an age of instantaneous digital gratification.

With Endzeit Bunkertracks you basically get four compilation CDs of tracks (typically remixed tracks) from various artists, combining established artists with a whole lot of up-and-comers. The compilations CDs are beautifully packaged in cardboard sleeves, which sit in a box that has traditionally come with commissioned artwork. Though the notion of “rare” tracks is close to redundant in a digital age, the majority of published tracks are said to be rare or unreleased at least as far as the physical release is concerned.

I can happily say that to date these compilations were responsible for introducing me to some of my all-time favourite dark, growly, stompy electronic music tunes. And yet, I’d be lying if I said I could readily identify as much as 75 per cent of the artists without referring to the liners notes or looking at my screen.

Despite this, I always eagerly anticipate the imminent release of a new Endzeit Bunkertracks instalment. Last year, this came in the form of Endzeit Bunkertracks Act VI.

Endzeit Bunkertracks VI including Endzeit 6 Sound Card. Sounds
From The Matrix 13 was also included as part of the package (not shown).  

 As has always been the case with the Endzeit compilations, there’s an inevitable proportion of filler (probably one of the reasons why I find it so hard to remember so many of the artists on these compilations). But that aside, the first thing that struck me about this last compilation was its astonishing value for money. In addition to the four CDs it also comes with what I call “standard issue” label compilation; that is, a “regular” compilation from the label, in this case Sounds From The Matrix 13. In addition to this, Endzeit Bunkertracks VI also came with what the “Endzeit 6 Sound Card” — a piece of plastic with a download code for 40 more tracks.

This means the compilation came with no less than — get this — 126 tracks. As one friend pointed out upon discovering this fact: “That’s too much music.” On one hand, a true cynic might suspect that the download-only tracks didn’t pass the cut for the pressed product. On the other, all this value kind of worries me because it shows just how much further an independent record label like Alfa Matrix has to go to just to register on people’s consciousnesses (apparently that’s not a word) .

The fact is, I like physical media, and I feel this is an important part of the Endzeit Bunkertracks package. You could call it artful packaging or trim; for me it comes down to being a pleasing product, much like the polished chrome on a motorcycle or the leather interior on a new car.

Another point. I rate Endzeit Bunkertracks as some of the very best industrial music compilations from a record label. I say that because record label-derived compilations have traditionally been kind of sketchy in my view as their objective is inevitably to push a roster. Those free CDs on magazine covers? They tend to be less hit and miss (depending on the originating magazine) and in many cases can be downright excellent — for the simple reason that they’re not bound to an individual record label.

But in this case, Endzeit Bunkertracks VI has 126 tracks from 108 artists. Not a bad effort for a small independent label.

Do you have a favourite? 

I’m fortunate to own all six Endzeit Bunkertracks compilations to date. I’ve also heard that some of them are difficult to come by, especially Endzeit Bunkertracks IV. Do you own any Endzeit compilations? Are you hunting down a particular edition? Do you have a favourite?

10 things you didn’t know about Lemmy from Motorhead

Lemmy Kilmister from Motorhead. From being Jimi Hendrix’s roadie (and scoring LSD for the man) to being recognised as the originator of speed metal, few people come even remotely close to embodying what rock n’ roll is about. And no one can rock quite so hard, or as loudly, as the band he founded, Motorhead.

The newest addition to the Motorhead discography, Aftermath, was released very recently. I got my physical copy as part of Classic Rock magazine while I was in the UK. It was a one-off special called Classic Rock presents Motorhead — Aftershock, which I might add was a fantastic read. So credit where credit is due: many of the facts and quotes were taken from this edition. So...

Here are 10 things you may not know about Lemmy

Photo: Mark Marek Photography

1. LEMME BORROW A FIVER

Lemmy’s real name is Ian Fraser Kilmister. His nickname apparently came from his younger wheeling and dealing days when he would ask people “lemme borrow a fiver”.

2. LEMMY ON RELIGION

Lemmy’s dislike for organised religion is well known, with some of his most classic tracks like (Don’t Need) Religion and Orgasmatron notoriously critical of the subject. It may have had something to do with his father, a former air force chaplain who left the family when he was a baby.

3. HE HATES THE DENTIST

When Lemmy was four years old he had 10 of his teeth removed without anaesthetic.

“I remember that like it was yesterday,” he told Classic Rock magazine. “I had blood all down me, my mother pulling me through the crowds on a Saturday in Stoke.” Consequently he avoided dentists until he was 50 years old.

4. LEMMY AND OZZY OSBOURNE ARE CLOSE MATES

Ozzy Osbourne and Lemmy are close friends. Lemmy even wrote or co-wrote a couple of Ozzy’s best known tracks including Hellraiser and I Don’t Want To Change The World. “When I came to America I was broke, I had nothing in the bank,” he told Classic Rock magazine. “Sharon Osbourne said, “Do you want to write four songs?” and they handed me this lump sum that was more money than I’d ever seen in my life. More money than I’d ever earned with Hawkwind and Motorhead.”

Photo: John Gullo

5. LEMMY ON JOINING HAWKWIND

It’s well known that Lemmy played bass in the seminal psychedelic rock outfit Hawkwind before he started Motorhead. What is perhaps less well known is the fact that (or at least he claims it to be so) he’d never picked up a bass guitar when he ‘auditioned’ for the band. A six-string guitar player until then, he happened to be at a gig where the Hawkwind bassist didn’t turn up. Hawkwind’s keyboard player, Dik Mik, was asked if anyone in the room played bass, pointed to Lemmy, who got up on stage, played a few bars, and got the gig.
Yes, that's how they did things back then.

6. LEMMY ON LEAVING HAWKWIND

Lemmy is famous for his stint in Hawkwind — but the manner in which he was fired is equally infamous. According to Lemmy, the rift developed after he was asked to re-record the vocals on a certain track because Hawkwind’s bi-polar-suffering vocalist Robert Calvert was unavailable due to the fact that he’d been admitted to hospital. The track, Silver Machine, became a major hit but the fact that it was Lemmy’s voice on the recording stirred up intense animosity among the other members of the band. Lemmy was eventually fired after being busted in Canada for drug possession (a charge that was later dropped). He has always claimed that it was “just an excuse to get rid of me” and reckons he was only bailed out because another bass player couldn’t be found to fill in on time. “So I did the show and at 4.30 in the morning I was fired,” says Lemmy.

He had the last laugh though. In addition to starting Motorhead, he adds that he really enjoyed “coming home and fucking all their old ladies. Not the ugly ones of course. But at least four. I took great pleasure in it. Eat that, you bastards.”

7. HE WAS 35 BEFORE MOTORHEAD GOT ANYWHERE

Lemmy was 30 years old when he first conjured up Motorhead. He’d been unceremoniously dumped from Hawkwind, and he soon found that getting a record company to release a full album of what was considered fast, dirty and loud noise was harder than he’d envisaged. Much, much harder.

For many people, getting sacked from your successful band, getting your new outfit voted the “best worst band in the world” by the music press, and then suffering years of knock-backs from record labels would be a fairly strong incentive to find a career that involves something other than rock music. Especially when your first album, On Parole, was recorded and remained unreleased by a greedy record label. Indeed, Motorhead’s self-titled debut album was initially meant to be a live recording of their final ever gig.

It wasn’t until Lemmy was in his mid thirties that Motorhead finally got some recognition and much-needed airplay with the 1979 release of the classic Motorhead album, Overkill.

8. EVERYONE LOVES MOTORHEAD

Countless bands have been influenced by Motorhead. Rock, punk, metal and other acts all cite them as paving the way over more than 30 years of heavy guitar music. And Motorhead know it. For example, the dark theme of the artwork on the fifteenth Motorhead album, We Are Motorhead, was essentially a nod to the many black and death metal bands that were big at the time who publicly cited Motorhead as an influence.

In 1995, Metallica famously played a gig as a Motorhead tribute band at the Whisky A Go Go. The occasion was Lemmy’s birthday  and Metallica took to the stage complete with big black fake wigs, sideburn moustache combos and sunglasses. Metallica’s Jason Newstead had an especially close encounter with Lemmy during a rendition of (We Are) The Roadcrew, a song Newstead had been playing since he first started a band: “So I thought, I’ve been doing it long enough. I got it memorised. Then Lemmy comes over right before the first verse, and he’s right in my face. He’s rubbing his warts on my fucking face! And while he’s rubbing that shit on my skin, he says, “Alright, don’t forget the words mate. Don’t fuck it up.” So of course, I’m distracted and I miss the first line. I didn’t have a chance — but he knew that.”

9. LEMMY IS NOT GOD

In the film Airheads, three rockers take hostages at a radio station in an effort to get some airplay for their would-be hit song. With the building surrounded by police, the band is at one time approached by Chris Moore, who claims to be an executive from a record label. Suspecting he may be an undercover cop, the band and Moore have the following exchange:

Chazz: Who’d win in a wrestling match, Lemmy or God?

Chris Moore: Lemmy.

(Rex imitates a game show buzzer)

Chris Moore: ... God?

Rex: Wrong, dickhead, trick question. Lemmy *is* God.

And yet Lemmy is mortal. He has a defibrillator implanted in his chest. It’s called an ICD — an implantable cardioverter-defibrilator. Unlike many regular pacemakers it’s permanent, and it’s designed to jolt you back to life if your heart stops unexpectedly.

So even Lemmy has his limits — who, it’s worth noting, at 67 years of age is still rocking out, and throughout his life has consumed enough drugs and alcohol to kill every elephant in Africa.

10. LEMMY LOVES HORSES

Lemmy loves horses. Even though he reckons he probably couldn’t ride one, he’s hinted that he’d probably spend a life around them if he ever retired from Motorhead.

So in other words, it’s unlikely he’ll ever get into horses.

MORE: Everyone should listen to at least one Motorhead album every day

  

As mentioned previously, credit needs to be given to the Classic Rock magazine special issue of Classic Rock presents Motorhead — Aftershock. It’s a damn good read from which I extracted many of the quotes above and it came with the Motorhead Aftershock album on the cover in a nice cardboard case. Get yourself a copy if you can.